| fucking february. |
yaaaaaaaah!! taaaaa fucking ma de. after wednesday, NEVER can i EVER listen to tchaikovsky's violin concerto without feeling nasty again. HORRRRRR-ENDOUS concert (for me). i don't even want to talk about what happened, but just that i am POSITIVE that no one will ever want me to play in their graduation concert ever again. AAARGH!!! every thing just keeps going wrong this month! february is a shit month!
and also! last thurs i became so dizzy during bikram, like, everything became pixel-lated and i couldn't hear anything. and i was quite hesitant to stop cuz it'll look like i'm so weak. but then i thought, what is more embarrassing, to appear weak, or to actually faint?? and so i lay down... for quite a while. yeah it was horrible!!
and i can't find a pianist for my chamber music! :(((( baaahhh mind in very bad state. AND TO ADD ON, fucking man utd conceded a goal to BLACKBURN?!?!!!! AARGH AARGH! bloody kuszczak!!! our clean sheet! after that i couldn't really watch the match, it was so painful!
AAAAAAAAAARRRRGHHH MUTHAFUCKING FEBRUARY! and YES, IT IS ABSOLUTELY FREEZING! whatever happened to spring?!!!!
and tanszaki (class concert) next tuesday. i am sure something will go wrong again. oh my ego, my ego!!! is being deflated faster than a balloon bursting. |
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| v-day and stuff cuz i'm too lazy to think of a decent title. |
this' year's v-day was special. VERRRRY special.
i spent it HOT AND SWEATY WITH A FIT, MODEL-ESQUE DUDE IN A ROOM.
MAMMA MIA!
i'm talking bikram yoga class, of course. haha. whatever. but the teacher is really hot! couldn't concentrate very well that lesson... needless to say i kept falling over. hahaha.
anyhow, i think my expectations are slowly but surely degnerating:
1. do you know any handsome, rich, single and straight guy?
2. do you know any handsome, single and straight guy?
3. do you know any decent-looking, single and straight guy?
4. do you know any single and straight guy?
5. do you know any guys who are not gay?
6. do you know any guys (bisexuals welcome)?
shit man, at this rate......... i'm at somewhere between point no.2 and 3 right now. v bad.
well! i must congratulate myself again, for successfully dancing vigorously to house fucking music! for 2 whole hours! and it wasn't even good music. it sucked! but you know how energy is contagious. i wasn't even drunk cuz being a RESPONSIBLE AND DILIGENT STUDENT, i had some concert the next day so i CONSCIOUSLY LIMITED my drinks. wow, i'm so mature! hahahahahah.
and you know how some guys don't read body language? especially when you DO NOT want to dance with them... ok, UGLY NEVERMIND (that's being muthafucking gracious already), CANNOT DANCE SOME MORE! WALAU. totally hindering my own fabulousness! attempts to dance away discreetly were constantly foiled by the idiot's blocking my way. BASTARD. had to resort to stopping and standing very still against the wall for 5 minutes until he went away, then resuming, and stopping when he came back. was finally SAVED when a mate got me on stage. jesus christ. next time i will just punch the guy in the nuts. saves me lots of trouble. bugger. school parties are so weird. the dj sucked, he played R KELLY! I BELIEVE I CAN FLY! i was like, goddamn, is this PROM?!?!!!! hahahaha. anyway, the next day i awoke in state of panic cuz i realised maybe half the school saw me grinding away shamelessly... but ach, fuck it! maybe they think all asians look the same, like i do with angmohs - but they do, they do! sometimes i say hello to people i don't know and sometimes people i think i don't know say hello to me, and i have to go all pretentious and "OH! HEEEEELLO!", while desperately racking my brains to think of their names. and it doesn't help that a lot of people share the same name.
oh yes. have you ever seen or heard something so beautiful your heart aches? yeah. i had heart-ache twice in a day on monday. first was tchaikovsky's violin concerto... i luuurrrrrve the second movement (hah, never thought you'd hear me saying something like that eh? i usually hate all second movements.). it actually brought tears to my eyes. though of course i didn't cry. and next was bottesini's concerto #2, 2nd movement. zomg, i love the part where the orch strings tremolo and there's a rising scale on the solo bass. AHHHHH my heart was so painful then! couldn't breathe. stupid bottesini, he shoulda developed more on that part. what a short climax. like want to cum but only cum halfway. asshole.
but most of you guys probably won't know what i'm talking about.
anyhow, that's it for this week! i'm so shagged every day i just plonk into bed and pass out. though strangely when i wake up i'm still as tired as ever. |
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| i am a master michelin-star chef. |
tried out BIKRAM yoga this week.
WAHHHH, shiokeneh. i prefer the ashtanga sequence (feels more hardcore and i like inversions), but i like the sweat in bikram. at the end of 90 minutes in 40 degrees celsius, walau, machiam like just emerge from swimming pool. everything wet. like, i can wring about 1 litre of sweat from my clothes man. DAMN SHIOK! always feel a bit thinner and stronger after that. hahaha! and i've been mistakened as a dancer today, OH, SO FLATTERED! though technically i WAS. THANK YOU, MOTHER, FOR THE 10 YEARS OF FORCED-BALLET AND 5 YEARS OF GYMNASTICS UNDER HORROR RUSSIAN COACH.
hehe! very happy! is this what everyone has been saying about endorphins? i feel like i can do anything. VERY dangerous feeling, as might (and usually i do) get carried away and imagine self to possess balls that i do not in reality, or else balls that i only possess after consuming the best part of a bottle of wine.
OH YES! WHICH REMINDS ME! SHIIIIIIT! bass concert on 24 feb! FAAAARRRK. i don't actually mind playing as much as i do memorising. because NOTHING EVER GOES RIGHT when i have to memorise something. ugh! hateful brain! |
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posted by mia at 